Lupin, and The Sequoians I have happened upon individuals I understood elsewhere–pupils
from the seminary at which I teach, a psychotherapist co-worker, a graphics
designer who has supplied me designs for continuing education promotion, a
Graduate Theological Union administrator. I’ve met interesting people who in
stock brokers, students, military, other clergy, all sorts and conditions.
Specific sense certainly there are moments of happiness and satisfaction but
the once-visualized joy, the independence and protection that beckoned are not quite
right. Things feel old and confining and splintered, a strait jacket that once
Seemed like wings. There are great moments to be sure, but something is missing.
Worse, this all may have happened more than once.
realization that there’s no one to blame but myself.
realization, however cloying it may feel, is rather a great thing. Believe of the
The readiness to do
something about it. Is there some way to settle issues and if that’s the case what’s that
As OMG I cannot believe I finally did it. After many years of me being a household nudist there’s
to be some evaluation of the scenario.
With some examination,
things grow a bit clearer. Isnt it my own habits, built up over a very long time,
that appear to direct these measures. And what are those customs? Looking as closesly
as possible, I discover that those wily Buddhists werent too far wrong: Greed,
Rage and folly, spliced together with attachments to each, are emphatic indeed.
I desire what I need when I want it, but have I truly taken the time to analyze
The response comes back, no I havent. I ‘ve supposed I understand who
I am and acted properly. If I dream it, it must be so. Since it doesnt turn
out so, something is out of whack.
Examining further, I
Find change, a matter about which I was capable of saying a great deal but
incapable of actually recognizing in my heart or actualizing in my life. If I
Admit change in the deepest possible manner, where would that leave Me?”
you know, the me with dreams and staleness, with enjoyment and strait jackets, the
one who’s the same from one day to the next, the one others call guy or
Girl, kind or unkind, tall or short, shrewd or deluded, daddy or
Mom, rich or poor? Without the handholds, where would I be? On the
other hand, WITH the handholds, where’s it gotten me?
Without the handholds is
Frightening. This analyzing company leads to
some tight and fiery areas. Sometimes there’s a desire to fall back into a
World of blaming and crediting others, of being full of perfect dreams that
dissolve on contact, of a sure-footed me who succeeds and fails bring on the
Tooth Fairy or God or Easter Bunny or magic bullet! But there is no going back
for those who take their evaluations seriously. Halting before the examination
is over falling into old dependable ways of finding the one sure answer is a
Idiots assignment, a zealots delight. There is only one direction forwards.
It takes guts and
patience and uncertainty. Change is everywhere and constantly and analyzing its furthest
reaches is the endeavor at hand.
week, Several years ago, when I was just beginning to . Talk is cheap. Assessment is high-priced evaluation
Nude, so pennilessness and nakedness aren’t so poor. When there’s nothing to
Purchase, why buy it? How could we don what we already have on?
good against this nude skin?
I heard that Soen Roshi,
my teachers teacher, once stood before a group of Zen pupils and asked, Do
you want to see what a bodhisattva looks like? And he continued to strip down
to his skivvies.
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ViewLayer after layer of robes down to his skivvies, at which
Layer after layer is
examined. Layer after layer of comfort and
What we keep on and what
we take off is entirely our responsibility. Not taking responsibility leads to
Discontent. Taking duty well, its like skinny dipping
And being nude, how would it be possible to fail?
There doesnt the sun
feel good against this naked skin?
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